well all of you that actually read this, i have some good news
i finally got a job and its pretty fun
i feel like things are finally falling into place and i can finally start
living life the way i want.
hopefully i can move out soon and begin the next chapter of my life!
for now im just gonna try to do the best i can and keep doing what im doing
because i must be doing something right.
all that bad shit is behind me now and i can look to the future
as well as that, i have some good friends to share the journey with and i know
they always have my back cause if they dont then ill leave them behind.
other great stuff, a shit ton of new games are coming out that actually look good
as well as a bunch of movies that im actually excited for!
now if i could just settle down and write something for my book then i might actually
exceed my own expectations haha
well for now i think i can honestly say im happy,
i would say i should look for a girlfriend but i dont think i need to look.
ill just let her find me, seems like its bound to happen with all this good
stuff happening to me anyways.
to all my readers out there, thanks for caring enough to waste a minute or two of
your time to read this. i dont really know who you are but you are pretty fucking koo
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Monday, June 4, 2012
Whats up internet?
hey guys i know its been a while since ive talked to you and i apologize for that
well where do i begin. life isnt as bad i thought it was. i mean things are still
all over the place but it really isnt as bad as it used to be. i can shrug off the bad things
and hold onto the good things. school is going pretty good, almost ready to transfer to the
university! im excited about that cause that means im closer to getting on with the rest of my life!
remember back when i said i didnt have any friends? it turns out i really did and i was just being a
loner cause im not that bright. we have been hanging out alot and we are Bros.
My writing has improved a lot and im excited about that. Im working on two pieces but i cant really
go into detail cause i dont want you all to steal them! ive also written a bunch of poetry and i think
its pretty good and so does my friend Vanesa who reads all my poems.
The direction my life has been going is not bad and i can see me riding this one out for a while.
I hope there is more good stuff to come because when bad stuff happens to me, it tends to pile on and
thats just not good for anyone. Lets just put a pin in that and see what happens.
well idk what else to say because its been a while since ive talked to you internet and those people that
read this, idk who you are but you are awesome. if you like reading this enough to continue reading then
im super impressed because honestly when i started writing this, it was a bit narcissistic.
if it means anything, if you guys have questions about me or something i can help you with then let me know
cause i love helping people out. makes me feel like im doing something productive with my life rather than
spending all my time on the internet looking at stupid pictures or reading what my friends are doing with
their lives. just write something in the comment box if you feel like it. i dont care what you write in there
cause its koo seeing that anyone wrote something. thanks. later internet and readers!
well where do i begin. life isnt as bad i thought it was. i mean things are still
all over the place but it really isnt as bad as it used to be. i can shrug off the bad things
and hold onto the good things. school is going pretty good, almost ready to transfer to the
university! im excited about that cause that means im closer to getting on with the rest of my life!
remember back when i said i didnt have any friends? it turns out i really did and i was just being a
loner cause im not that bright. we have been hanging out alot and we are Bros.
My writing has improved a lot and im excited about that. Im working on two pieces but i cant really
go into detail cause i dont want you all to steal them! ive also written a bunch of poetry and i think
its pretty good and so does my friend Vanesa who reads all my poems.
The direction my life has been going is not bad and i can see me riding this one out for a while.
I hope there is more good stuff to come because when bad stuff happens to me, it tends to pile on and
thats just not good for anyone. Lets just put a pin in that and see what happens.
well idk what else to say because its been a while since ive talked to you internet and those people that
read this, idk who you are but you are awesome. if you like reading this enough to continue reading then
im super impressed because honestly when i started writing this, it was a bit narcissistic.
if it means anything, if you guys have questions about me or something i can help you with then let me know
cause i love helping people out. makes me feel like im doing something productive with my life rather than
spending all my time on the internet looking at stupid pictures or reading what my friends are doing with
their lives. just write something in the comment box if you feel like it. i dont care what you write in there
cause its koo seeing that anyone wrote something. thanks. later internet and readers!
Sunday, April 29, 2012
its been a while
well its definitely been a while since ive written anything on here so i guess its just time for
and update.
well my writing is doing a little better, have a couple original ideas that i dont want to discuss
because i dont want you to steal them
life in general is pretty good and there are few complaints to be made which is always a good thing and school
is still as boring as ever, but i still go most of the time
the amount of shinaniganns i get into now a days is a lot less than it has been in the past but that doesnt mean
that i still dont do it haha
as each year goes by i lose more friends, meet up with old ones, and make new ones
now its only months until the big 21 so im pretty excited for that!
still no job but working on it so hopefully that comes together soon so that i can move out and shit
idk what else to tell you guys cause its been pretty much the same as the last time, just a little older and still as dumb
and update.
well my writing is doing a little better, have a couple original ideas that i dont want to discuss
because i dont want you to steal them
life in general is pretty good and there are few complaints to be made which is always a good thing and school
is still as boring as ever, but i still go most of the time
the amount of shinaniganns i get into now a days is a lot less than it has been in the past but that doesnt mean
that i still dont do it haha
as each year goes by i lose more friends, meet up with old ones, and make new ones
now its only months until the big 21 so im pretty excited for that!
still no job but working on it so hopefully that comes together soon so that i can move out and shit
idk what else to tell you guys cause its been pretty much the same as the last time, just a little older and still as dumb
Thursday, February 23, 2012
bullies
i guess its always been a really big problem that was always swept under the rug
i never really experienced this much until high school because i went to a catholic school with very small class sizes. we all knew each other and pretty much had to get along.
once i got to high school i began to see this in different ways
when i first got to high school, i didnt know anyone so it was really difficult to try and figure out where to fit in
i played sports so it was easy to fit in with the "jocks" but i was also good in school so i hung out with the smart kids too
ive always sat in the middle of these 2 fences, but always leaned more on the smart kids side because school was more important than being "cool"
i mean yea i teased some kids, who hasnt, but i dont think i took it to the point were it was affecting someones life, that i know of.
im not a mean person and i dont like hurting people
and ive seen the popular kids ridicule and pick on anyone that wasnt in their group
most of the time i would side with my friends, the smart kids, because the popular
crowd wasnt very bright and wasnt really going anywhere after high school
i even saw this at other schools.
the worst part about all of this is that those kids picking on other kids, wont make anything out of their lives most of the time
then they try to say that they were nice to other kids in school when all they did was make fun of everyone around them that didnt fit into their groups
fortunately i never encountered bullying that severely affected someones life in a way that was harmful to their being
i always stuck with my friends because i knew that friendship was better than being popular in high school
besides, we wanted to go to college and do something with our lives instead of throw it all away before we even got there
oh well, bullying is wrong and people should be more aware of it because it is a serious problem that must be dealt with
no one should have to be put through these types of things no matter what
and for the smart kids out there, hang in there cause it will all pay off
i never really experienced this much until high school because i went to a catholic school with very small class sizes. we all knew each other and pretty much had to get along.
once i got to high school i began to see this in different ways
when i first got to high school, i didnt know anyone so it was really difficult to try and figure out where to fit in
i played sports so it was easy to fit in with the "jocks" but i was also good in school so i hung out with the smart kids too
ive always sat in the middle of these 2 fences, but always leaned more on the smart kids side because school was more important than being "cool"
i mean yea i teased some kids, who hasnt, but i dont think i took it to the point were it was affecting someones life, that i know of.
im not a mean person and i dont like hurting people
and ive seen the popular kids ridicule and pick on anyone that wasnt in their group
most of the time i would side with my friends, the smart kids, because the popular
crowd wasnt very bright and wasnt really going anywhere after high school
i even saw this at other schools.
the worst part about all of this is that those kids picking on other kids, wont make anything out of their lives most of the time
then they try to say that they were nice to other kids in school when all they did was make fun of everyone around them that didnt fit into their groups
fortunately i never encountered bullying that severely affected someones life in a way that was harmful to their being
i always stuck with my friends because i knew that friendship was better than being popular in high school
besides, we wanted to go to college and do something with our lives instead of throw it all away before we even got there
oh well, bullying is wrong and people should be more aware of it because it is a serious problem that must be dealt with
no one should have to be put through these types of things no matter what
and for the smart kids out there, hang in there cause it will all pay off
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
i have a dream
like most others i want to be rich and somewhat famous
but i dont want to be an actor or anything like that.
i want to be the one making people famous, i want to write movies and create
shows or anything that will put my name out there as a writer
i dont want to have a book that will be part of any literary analysis,
i just want my name out there.
i want to make people happy with the thoughts from my mind.
there is all this stuff running around in my head and most of it never has a chance
to see the light of day, but someday i hope to change that
i believe i have a talent for writing and my mind is creative.
people may say that i lack focus or knowledge
fuck it, im probably unfocused and stupid, but i wont quit
i want to use the talents i have to do something good
and in my mind thats making movies or anything that will entertain people!!
help make that dream come true and believe
who knows, i might become famous and remember you...
but i dont want to be an actor or anything like that.
i want to be the one making people famous, i want to write movies and create
shows or anything that will put my name out there as a writer
i dont want to have a book that will be part of any literary analysis,
i just want my name out there.
i want to make people happy with the thoughts from my mind.
there is all this stuff running around in my head and most of it never has a chance
to see the light of day, but someday i hope to change that
i believe i have a talent for writing and my mind is creative.
people may say that i lack focus or knowledge
fuck it, im probably unfocused and stupid, but i wont quit
i want to use the talents i have to do something good
and in my mind thats making movies or anything that will entertain people!!
help make that dream come true and believe
who knows, i might become famous and remember you...
untitled poem
you sit behind your wall of lies,
wearing your mask so the world knows not
the face that cries behind it.
emotions running wild in the mind
but damned if you will let the true ones show.
eyes fierce, seeing if that boy might ever
be the man you keep wishing for in those wild fantasies.
keep convincing yourself you are better off alone
than always hurting. Cover up with smiles
practically painted on, fighting off the onslaught
of other offers when the only one you want is gone.
-women are mysterious creatures and guys try to understand
-but they are also elusive.
-cant get too close without getting bit!
-they lose to push guys away so that they can keep coming
-back, until they push too hard.
-men only try to make women happy; that is if they let us.
can never be held down because they are
too independent, but can never be alone.
forever want guys around, but cant stand
when all they see is his face.
-we are fighting a losing battle, but we wont
-ever stop because we need love too...
wearing your mask so the world knows not
the face that cries behind it.
emotions running wild in the mind
but damned if you will let the true ones show.
eyes fierce, seeing if that boy might ever
be the man you keep wishing for in those wild fantasies.
keep convincing yourself you are better off alone
than always hurting. Cover up with smiles
practically painted on, fighting off the onslaught
of other offers when the only one you want is gone.
-women are mysterious creatures and guys try to understand
-but they are also elusive.
-cant get too close without getting bit!
-they lose to push guys away so that they can keep coming
-back, until they push too hard.
-men only try to make women happy; that is if they let us.
can never be held down because they are
too independent, but can never be alone.
forever want guys around, but cant stand
when all they see is his face.
-we are fighting a losing battle, but we wont
-ever stop because we need love too...
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
getting back into the grind
so this week i have started going back to the gym after not going for about 2 months
i have to say that it is a lot harder than i expected, but i guess thats what i get
last time though i wasnt really focused on working out, but rather just getting bigger
now i think i have a different goal. i want to lose the weight i have put on and build muscle from the ground up(legs then upper body)
i like working out even though it always kicks my ass cause it makes me feel better
not only mentally, but physically.
im not talking about appearance wise, but like on the inside.
i feel like i run smoother when i work out rather than now
its probably like super obvious, but i usually see things when they slap me in the face so oh well
anyways, i think its gonna be a struggle getting started and keeping it up for a while
but im confident that once i get going i can keep it up
not stopping until i look like a fucking god!
also school is going alright...cant really complain too much
i have to say that it is a lot harder than i expected, but i guess thats what i get
last time though i wasnt really focused on working out, but rather just getting bigger
now i think i have a different goal. i want to lose the weight i have put on and build muscle from the ground up(legs then upper body)
i like working out even though it always kicks my ass cause it makes me feel better
not only mentally, but physically.
im not talking about appearance wise, but like on the inside.
i feel like i run smoother when i work out rather than now
its probably like super obvious, but i usually see things when they slap me in the face so oh well
anyways, i think its gonna be a struggle getting started and keeping it up for a while
but im confident that once i get going i can keep it up
not stopping until i look like a fucking god!
also school is going alright...cant really complain too much
Monday, January 23, 2012
what is this sorcery!
i dont think i have anything interesting to say today but i feel like writing something so i hope you are all paying attention
im pretty sure i have multiple viruses on my computer and im too lazy to back everything up and reboot my computer
im sorta tired of playing all the games i have right now and im running out of ideas for movies to watch
as ive probably said like a million times, but i know no one reads this so its alright, i need a job or whatever
something to occupy my time that is constructive and will pay!
oh well, schools fun, life is alright...hopefully this year goes by smoothly and i can get on with the rest of my life haha
im pretty sure i have multiple viruses on my computer and im too lazy to back everything up and reboot my computer
im sorta tired of playing all the games i have right now and im running out of ideas for movies to watch
as ive probably said like a million times, but i know no one reads this so its alright, i need a job or whatever
something to occupy my time that is constructive and will pay!
oh well, schools fun, life is alright...hopefully this year goes by smoothly and i can get on with the rest of my life haha
Saturday, January 14, 2012
another year
well it seems like about this time last year i was in pretty deep and fucking my life up pretty bad
well had been a shitty year, but lets see if we can make this one just a little better
i have a few goals for this year that are pretty reasonable to meet and i think if i stay my ass out of trouble i can keep to my goals
i have some good friends and i think they will help me stay on track
another thing is im finally turning 21 this year so im looking forward to that!!
gonna be some exciting times!
i guess this is the year to go big or go home with all this speculation of the world ending and whatnot
so look out world i think i might actually make an impact this year, or at least make myself look better haha
well had been a shitty year, but lets see if we can make this one just a little better
i have a few goals for this year that are pretty reasonable to meet and i think if i stay my ass out of trouble i can keep to my goals
i have some good friends and i think they will help me stay on track
another thing is im finally turning 21 this year so im looking forward to that!!
gonna be some exciting times!
i guess this is the year to go big or go home with all this speculation of the world ending and whatnot
so look out world i think i might actually make an impact this year, or at least make myself look better haha
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
im on a roll
well as i sit here in front of my computer like i do on most nights i feel the need to write stuff down and i dont know why
where to begin, the new year has started off kinda slow and idk what to make of it?
i guess its good that its been uneventful considering where i was about this time last year. i have come a long way and at the same time ive taken so many steps back.
i have learned a bit more self control and how to say no to something that could potentially be the wrong thing for me, but i really havent done much with my life besides go to school. I havent met any of my plans: such as move out, get a job, or become self reliant.
Now i can see that ive made some progress, but it still isnt what i want. Hopefully this year i can do more for myself and get some of the things i need done.
On another note, i feel really confident about the movies that are coming out soon(as you know im a bit of a movie enthusiast) because although some may be remakes of older versions and some originals, they seem to be promising. Both in quality and that movie nuance. Non the less i am excited for plenty of titles to come out and i dont think i can wait for some.
They should really start paying me to go to the movies as much as i go, seriously.
Also i think this year im going to start changing up my style just to break things up. New year, new me. Well maybe not completely change it, but lets say add a little more class and sophistication to it, i guess haha
im tired of ranting for tonight, until the next time....whenever that might be
where to begin, the new year has started off kinda slow and idk what to make of it?
i guess its good that its been uneventful considering where i was about this time last year. i have come a long way and at the same time ive taken so many steps back.
i have learned a bit more self control and how to say no to something that could potentially be the wrong thing for me, but i really havent done much with my life besides go to school. I havent met any of my plans: such as move out, get a job, or become self reliant.
Now i can see that ive made some progress, but it still isnt what i want. Hopefully this year i can do more for myself and get some of the things i need done.
On another note, i feel really confident about the movies that are coming out soon(as you know im a bit of a movie enthusiast) because although some may be remakes of older versions and some originals, they seem to be promising. Both in quality and that movie nuance. Non the less i am excited for plenty of titles to come out and i dont think i can wait for some.
They should really start paying me to go to the movies as much as i go, seriously.
Also i think this year im going to start changing up my style just to break things up. New year, new me. Well maybe not completely change it, but lets say add a little more class and sophistication to it, i guess haha
im tired of ranting for tonight, until the next time....whenever that might be
Fear
there are many things in the world that people are afraid of and there are things that people fear!
being afraid of something means that you are aware of what it is and why it makes you afraid of it, but to fear something is completely different.
it is that feeling there is something waiting for you around that dark corner, the unexpected noise in the middle of the night, or the thought of waking up and not knowing where you are.
I have this idea for the scariest movie ever, but i really want to understand fear in its most basic and primal essence. Im not talking about going to some haunted house or reading stories of monsters. What i am looking for is that gut wrenching fear that grabs a hold of a person that stops them in their tracks with no explanation or reason. That fear that stops all brain activity so that you focus in on the most basic thoughts.
I dont want this to be a grotesque movie that scares the audience by disgusting them, or creating some scenario where a demonic presence that remains unseen terrifies people, or were a weapon wielding psycho kills a bunch of hot teens.
I want to make a movie that psychologically scares the auidence to the point were they will leave the theater in fear of something that cant be simply explained or forgotten. I want to grab each person that watches this movie and have them tremble at the thought of being scared because they will truely know what fear is.
This might be hard to grasp because throughout history scary movies have a bad guy or something that represents a bad thing. I dont want to be typical or trivial.
I want this to be raw and original, primal even. Take the most basic definition of fear and use that to incite that fear upon my viewers.
Now you may ask how i plan on making such a film. Well to answer that simply, idk? I will say that i will find a way because if its one thing i want to do, thats to make a movie that will change the game. I dont my movie to be looked at as some horror film because it might not even be one. It will be merely a look into the inner realm of the mind that most people tend to hide from and not let their mind delve into.
I dare you to let your mind wander into that dark void and see what you can find there. You might just find out that you may have a very dark side...
being afraid of something means that you are aware of what it is and why it makes you afraid of it, but to fear something is completely different.
it is that feeling there is something waiting for you around that dark corner, the unexpected noise in the middle of the night, or the thought of waking up and not knowing where you are.
I have this idea for the scariest movie ever, but i really want to understand fear in its most basic and primal essence. Im not talking about going to some haunted house or reading stories of monsters. What i am looking for is that gut wrenching fear that grabs a hold of a person that stops them in their tracks with no explanation or reason. That fear that stops all brain activity so that you focus in on the most basic thoughts.
I dont want this to be a grotesque movie that scares the audience by disgusting them, or creating some scenario where a demonic presence that remains unseen terrifies people, or were a weapon wielding psycho kills a bunch of hot teens.
I want to make a movie that psychologically scares the auidence to the point were they will leave the theater in fear of something that cant be simply explained or forgotten. I want to grab each person that watches this movie and have them tremble at the thought of being scared because they will truely know what fear is.
This might be hard to grasp because throughout history scary movies have a bad guy or something that represents a bad thing. I dont want to be typical or trivial.
I want this to be raw and original, primal even. Take the most basic definition of fear and use that to incite that fear upon my viewers.
Now you may ask how i plan on making such a film. Well to answer that simply, idk? I will say that i will find a way because if its one thing i want to do, thats to make a movie that will change the game. I dont my movie to be looked at as some horror film because it might not even be one. It will be merely a look into the inner realm of the mind that most people tend to hide from and not let their mind delve into.
I dare you to let your mind wander into that dark void and see what you can find there. You might just find out that you may have a very dark side...
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